Soupe du Jour and Brothers Moon, or My Birthday: 2006

we went to this place in hopewell called Soupe du Jour, which is where i will definitely be celebrating every holiday possible for as long as the place is open. the food is AMAZING, the ambiance is awesome -- it's like eating in somebody's semi-sloppy but cute and comfy house, and you can see/smell all the food getting cooked. i got a special of the day, it was vegetable eggs benedict. you may know of my interest in eggs benedict from previous posts about crabby eggs -- well, this shit definitely gave the crabby eggs a run for their money.

"vegetable eggs benedict" consisted of a toasted english muffin spread with pesto, then layered with a slice of grilled eggplant, a slice of roasted tomato and a poached egg, all topped with hollandaise sauce. OMG SO GOOD. teff and i also split a side order of home fries (crispy-fried potatoes, green peppers and sweet onions) topped with white cheddar cheese and bacon. yeah, you wish you ate that. but that's not all. when we first walked in at 11 a.m. (the time they open), there was a pan of still-hot, totally fresh muffins cooling on the counter that smelled like...i don't even know what, like heaven or some shit, so of course we had to get one to share for breakfast dessert. they were pumpkin pear cranberry muffins with a pecan crumb topping. we put butter on it because, you know, what's dessert without extra butter? it tasted like bread pudding, it was so dense and rich and moist and delicious. the fruit -- pears and cranberries -- weren't some dried up bullshit, they were freshly sliced actual fruits that still had mad juice in them. jesus i'm getting so sad thinking about how this meal is over. let's move on.

that afternoon, mom came over. after we sat around bullshitting and looking at stuff on the internet for a couple hours, we went over to brothers moon fancy restaurant on broad street in hopewell. i'd never been there before, but i'd been dying for a reason to have somebody buy me dinner there because i'd heard it's awesome and insanely expensive. it was definitely both. we each got a soup, an entree, and a dessert, and everything RULED. it's byob so we brought some yellow tail. i got squash soup, a crabcake with asparagus and crispy potatoes, and chocolate bread pudding for dessert with bent spoon vanilla ice cream on top. you know, it was so good that i can't even like try to describe it, i'll just sound like a fucking idiot with all the exclamations and superlatives and capital letters. so just go there. i know i know, 25 bucks for an entree is a lot, but just suck it the fuck up and go. you can byob man, at least you don't have to pay for drinks. the waitress also dropped my mom's wine glass and it broke and i felt really bad for her, so yeah she gets bonus points. i love how i like restaurants BETTER when the waitstaff fucks up. i'm such a retard.

when i get home, crissy wants to go out for drinks! YESS! so we went to tiger's tale in rocky hill and had gin & tonics and vodka & tonics and a giant APPLE CRISP. yeah, that's right, i fucking ate even more. for those of you who have never had the apple crisp at tiger's tale, you need to get it. listen to me dudes -- for real -- this is no ordinary apple crisp. this shit is like apple pie with sugar cookie dough on top. trust me, just get it. before i went to meet crissy, katie k called and asked me to stop by real quick so she could give me a present! she's so sweet!!! she gave me a really awesome smelling candle from la jolie and, of course, LINDT CHOCOLATES FOR MY FAT ASS!!!!!!!!!!!

i will conclude this epic post with a final, extremely crucial observation:

TODAY I ATE OVER 110 DOLLARS WORTH OF FOOD AND I DID NOT PAY FOR ANY OF IT!!!!! BEING 24 ISN'T SO BAD AFTER ALL!!!!

Cape Gay

I went to the beach for a few days with my friend's family, and it obviously ruled, but it ruled even more because we went out to dinner one night. His parents are rich, so the restaurant was no less than INCREDIBLE, and I got this:

Pesce Putesca (or something, I forget the second word)

It was some really long, wide noodles that were paper-thin and delicious -- kinda like super long egg-noodles, as his mom described them. This was topped with a SMOKING ASS DELICIOUS fucking lobster champagne cream sauce -- yes, lobster and champagne in one creamy sauce, this is what rich people eat. Mixed in with these quality ingredients were seared scallops and shrimp. SCALLOPS TASTED LIKE SOME STRAIGHT BUTTER. SO GOOD. I MISS THIS DINNER SO MUCH I WANNA BARF IT AND EAT IT AGAIN. The restaurant was called Fresco's, and it was in Cape May. Highly recommended. They had good white wine there too, it was real sweet but not in a gross way.

Fat Beach Island

i discovered two key new things to put in my fat face during my recent trip to long beach island. these are available at "the plantation" expensive restaurant and "scojo's" not-that-expensive breakfast zone, both located near surf city on LB Blvd. you should probably go get them either right now or tomorrow.

#1. "jamaican banana bread ice cream sandwich."
pretty self-explanatory dessert. two slices of the most delicious dense-ass banana bread i ever tasted in my whole garbage life, with a scoop of perfectly softened praline ice cream in the middle. chocolate sauce on top. ruled. A +

#2. "crabby eggs."
i know that sounds sick, but trust me. crabby eggs has reshaped the history of breakfast. me and my sister split one, but in its original state, crabby eggs was two giant crab cakes, each topped with a poached egg and covered in hollandaise sauce. kind of like eggs benedict, except eggs benedict can pretty much suck crabby eggs' crabby dick. this came with an orange slice, a strawberry, two pieces of good toast, and the awesomest version of hash browns i ever had. they were seasoned with something old bayish, so they went awesome with crab, and made it less weird to eat seafood with coffee. waitress totally gave us two plates, and accidentally burned herself on something, so extra credit for that. A + +